4th Dimensional Lampshade

Is this some sort of a game to you?!

Please wish responsibly 

Ancient Beer-stein of the Gods

I’m telling you I found the bloody thing in a shrine in the middle of the woods! And I’m proper thirsty cus all the hiking. Next thing I knew the bleedin’ thing disappears and I wake up next to this pile of nachos the size of a lorry and the ground has turned to guacamole under me! Seriously I got about a half stone of the stuff still in me underpants. Looks like an ogre and me had a tumble. I can’t even remember how I got into that alleyway either it was at least 100 miles from where I parked me car, but one thing’s for certain that was a wiiiild night!

Book of Spoilers

Once upon a time, everyone died and lobsters ruled to world in eternal peace. The End.

Candy Crusher Missile

match 3 to remove your enemies from the board

Gamma Ray’s Gamma Ray Gun

MD-16-553 Henchperson upkeep too high? Matsudo is right for you!

Combat Drone XVI

MD-16-553 Henchperson upkeep too high? Try the MD-16-553 Combat Drone XVI. Improved lift and battery life offers you a modifiable platform with the widest array of armaments and sensor packages available. With the new 15tri cor quantum hertz processor the XVI is fully capable of voice commands, independent decision making, and friend/foe detection. Download our new personality suite to get audio feedback, enhanced interrogation techniques, and witty remarks. Matsudo is right for you!

E.M.C.A. Field Replicator

Standard issue has never been this cool.

G.I. Exo-Suit

Standard issue has never been this cool.

Gumdrop Cannon

It’s like shoots and ladders, but mostly it just shoots

Inter-dimensional Plot-hole

Keep your hands and legs inside at all times and places.

Matsudo Care Package

Home delivery for all your energy equipment needs. Matsudo is Right for you.

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Maximus Mechimus

Not to be confused with its creator Mechimus Maximus.

Mr. Ramzis

He’s just a big softy.

Positronic Reflector

MS-206. Don’t let those cosmic storms worry you. You’re protected. Matsudo is Right for you.

Rocket Boots

Three step manual included.

Rocket Plane

Who needs jet propulsion when you have highly concentrated rocket fuel?

Shield Generator

MS-102. Home is where your stuff is. Keep it safe. Matsudo is Right for you.

SpaceTime Duct Tape

There is a dark and light side and it holds a shocking amount of the univers together.
~ Professor Paranormal 

Super Suit

Underwear on the outside optional.

The Fez

no one is happy when they look in to their own future because they either see things they already knew were going to happen or…. you know… there sudden and often unavoidable death. Enjoy your next week of life.

The Red Button

Push it real hard!